A Bad Storm!
by No1butjoe
Summary: When Joe loses his memory, it's up to Adam to take care of him. Will Joe ever remember his family? And how much will this effect Adam? Joe is around 10 and Adam is around 22.
1. Chapter 1

**A Bad Storm!**

**By bonanzagal and No1butjoe**

**A/N: This is another RPG bonanzagal and I did.**

**Disclaimer - We don't own Bonanza or any related characters.**

**Summary - When Joe loses his memory, it's up to Adam to take care of him. Will Joe ever remember his family? And how much will this effect Adam?**

Adam leaned back in the saddle a little, allowing Sport to take full control of their destination home. Upon reaching the yard, he dismounted and guided the horse into the barn, where he started to remove his saddle and settled him in for the night. With a heavy sigh, Adam headed inside, placing his coat on the rack and his hat beside it as he unbuckled his gun belt.

Joe heard Adam come in and bounded down the stairs. "Hey Adam! You're back! Harvey went to the outhouse, but he probably heard you comin, so I guess he'll just go on back to the bunkhouse."

Adam nodded, physically exhausted from working all day. "Is Hop Sing cooking dinner?"

Joe shook his head, "Nuh uh, he's not back from bringing in the supplies yet. He said he got a reeeeeally late start, and left us a casserole in the oven. You just gotta heat it up."

Adam nodded in understanding and headed for the kitchen. Without a word, he began heating the casserole before heading back out into the main room and up the stairs. "I'm just gonna go get changed. I'll be right back down."

Joe nodded, "Okay." Just than a crack of thunder reverberated through the room, making the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. "Guess you're lucky you got home when you did! That was a doozy!"

Adam nodded from where he had stopped on the landing and now continued upstairs to his room where he took his time changing into more comfortable clothes.

Joe turned to go sit on the settee, when he heard a loud banging noise in the wind. Sounded like Adam forgot to shut the barn door. Joe looked towards the stairs and back at the front door. Adam sure looked tired when he came in, but he wasn't sure he'd appreciate Joe running out and getting soaked either. Joe weighed the pros and cons in his head, finally deciding it could be FUN to run out there, AND he'd be helping Adam. How could he argue with that? Grinning he pulled on his boots and coat, then went out into the night, carefully shutting the front door behind him.

Adam finished changing and walked back downstairs, fully expecting to see Joe down there, waiting for dinner to finish heating up. Finding no trace of his younger brother, Adam frowned but continued on to the kitchen where the casserole was waiting to be put on the table. That done, Adam looked around again. "Joe? Dinner's ready."

The cold wind whipped the sheets of freezing rain, directly at Joe, quickly soaking him to the bone. Okay, maybe this would have been more fun in a summer storm. Oh well, he was already out here, he may as well hurry and get it done. He trudged over to the barn, the cold droplets stinging his eyes as he grabbed a hold of the heavy door. The wind seemed to work against him, but soon he had it about halfway closed. He began hearing a muffled whinnying coming from the depths of the barn, almost lost to the howling of the wind, but it was there and getting louder and more frantic by the second. Joe sighed, as he entered the sanctuary of the barn, this was turning out more than he had bargained for. He shivered and started walking to the back, finally coming to the stall of a powerful and skittish stallion, wild eyed and pounding the floor with his front hooves. Joe tried what he had seen Hoss do many times before, he stroked the animals frothy shoulders, and murmured soothingly to it. "It's okay Poseidon, it's just a little rain, it won't hurt you. Isn't it kinda i-iron...er funny for a horse named after a sea god to be scared of water?" For a minute, it seemed to be working... that is until a lightening flash lit up the barn, followed by the loudest thunder clap yet. Sharp hooves sliced through the air, and a small body crumpled to the floor.

Adam was just heading upstairs to look for Joe when he heard the noise rising above the wind, rain, and thunder. Frowning, he descended the stairs and put his jacket back on. The rain beat down on him mercilessly as he made his way to the barn, the door swinging wildly. With great effort, he grabbed it and closed it behind him as he entered, his eyes looking all around. "Joe? Joe, are you in here?" No answer came and he was just about to turn to head back out, when a small noise caught his attention. Going a little further back, he saw Poseidon standing in his stall, snorting and beating the dirt. Just as Adam was about to go calm the animal, he spotted Joe lying almost flush against the bottom of the stall door, blood trickling from a head wound. "Joe!" Adam dropped to his little brother's side, feeling his forehead and determining there wasn't a fever. He inspected the cut closely, using his handkerchief to clean the blood away as best he could. Thunder continued clapping in the distance and the horses stomped their hooves as Adam gently lifted Joe into his arms. Laying him on a bail of hay, Adam continued with what he was doing and cleaned the cut until the blood was gone. Finished, he tore a piece of his shirt and wrapped it around Joe's head to stem anymore bleeding. Sighing in relief, Adam leaned back a little, worried that Joe hadn't waken up yet. "Joe? Joe, wake up. Come on, Little Buddy."

Joe's eyes stayed closed tight, but his lips opened slightly and a few words passed, spoken so softly as to be barely audible. "Door...Poseidon *mumble* *mumble* storm." Then fell back into silence.

Adam's worry grew and he looked anxiously towards the door, wishing more than anything it wasn't storming. He didn't want to take Joe out in the storm, but he had no choice seeing as it was much warmer and comfortable. Making a decision, Adam quickly shed his jacket and slid Joe into it, his small body being swallowed up by the large coat. Hefting a horse blanket from one of the empty stalls, he carefully wrapped Joe inside, making sure he was secure and little rain would touch him. That done, Adam lifted Joe into his arms again and set out for the house. The rain was ice cold and it bit at Adam as he forced his way to the house. He held Joe close to him, shielding his face from the wind and rain. Finally, they arrived at the house and Adam hurried inside. Setting Joe on the settee, he closed the front door before hurrying back to him. Adam unwrapped his brother from the blanket and his jacket as well as the small one he had been wearing outside, making Adam wonder what had possibly possessed him to go out in the first place. Dashing that question from his mind, Adam grabbed warm blankets from the guest room and threw them over Joe. Doing everything in his power to keep Joe warm and comfortable, Adam finally seated himself in the armchair, his gaze never wavering from his younger brother's face as he waited anxiously for Joe to wake up.

After a while a small grown escaped Joe's lips, his brows furrowing together. Finally he opened his eyes, and found he had a little difficulty focusing his vision, right then. But there was definitely someone there, someone sitting there looking at him. He licked his lips and tested his voice. "Wa..water?" He managed to croak out of his dry throat.

As soon as he heard Joe's plea, Adam was on his feet and heading for the kitchen. He rushed back moments later with a glass of water and gently tipped it to Joe's lips.

Joe drank greedily, quickly draining the glass. He pushed it away, and blinked several times, taking a quick evaluation of his body. "My head hurts. Really hurts." He stated matter of factly. He lifted one of his sore leaden arms to his head, surprised to find fabric there. He ran his fingers gently over the bandage, wincing and taking in a sharp hiss of breath, as his fingers lightly made contact with the wound. Tears sprung to his eyes, and he turned to the man sitting beside him. "What happened? Where am I? Why does it feel like someone beat me up, than hit me in the head with a hammer?" His eyes started to go a little fearful, what if this man HAD done that? But then why would he give him water?

Adam frowned at Joe's behavior. "We're home, Joe. You were knocked on the head pretty hard. I'm guessing one of the horses spooked you and you fell." Adam wasn't liking this. Joe had yet to call him by name.

Joe frowned, the name sounded vaguely familiar, like something out of a dream, but it didn't feel like it belonged to him. Joe...hmm. He lifted his head slightly, and the world began to swim, he waited for it to steady before he looked around. Again, vaguely familiar, but not *his*. "Who's home? Yours?"

Adam stood and sat on the coffee table next to the settee. He looked directly into Joe's eyes, searching for something. Finally, he spoke. "You don't know who I am, do you?"

Joe thought hard, trying to access his memories, any memory, especially one concerning this man. The effort only leaving him exhausted, and with a headache feeling like an axe had been taken to his skull. His frown deepened, he was sorry, truly sorry, and was frustrated that he couldn't dredge up anything. He somehow had a feeling, an intuition that his next words were going to hurt this man. "No, I'm sorry, should I?"

Adam was about to say "Yes, you should. I'm your brother", but the memory of a similar situation back in Boston prevented him from saying it. The doctors who treated the man who had lost his memory came back to him. If he told Joe everything, there was a chance that his little brother would never remember who he was. A small, sad smile crossed Adam's face. "No, I guess not. My name's Adam. I found you out in the barn not too long ago. You were hurt so I brought you in here." Adam waited, wanting more than anything for Joe to suddenly smile and laugh, saying this was all a joke, but as time passed, Adam realized that it was no joke.


	2. Chapter 2

Joe wanted to ask this Adam fellow why he had even asked then, and why he had called this place home. But he was just so exhausted, all he wanted to do was sleep, not to think. Despite the warmth of the heavy blankets surrounding him, and the fire blazing in the hearth, he was starting to feel cold and shiver. He closed his eyes, and in as few movements as possible, huddled as much into the blankets as he could.

Adam kept his mask in place when he really wanted to shake Joe and force him to remember, but he didn't move. His gaze never left Joe as he watched him settle in. When Joe closed his eyes, Adam allowed it to happen. He allowed the tears to fall silently.

When the storm died down later that night, Adam sent one of the hands for the doctor. They arrived hours later and Adam breathed a sigh of relief as he stepped through the door.

Adam shook Paul Martin's hand eagerly. "Paul, thank you so much for coming. Joe hit his head on something in the barn and now he can't seem to remember who he is or anything else."

Paul nodded and stepped closer to his patient. After his examination, Paul took Adam aside. "Adam, you can't tell him who he is. If you do, well, he may not be able to handle all of the information at once and it could set him back further. Do you understand?"

Adam nodded, not trusting his voice.

Paul placed a hand on the younger man's shoulder, then squeezed before heading outside to leave.

Adam stood in the living room for a few minutes, just staring at the floor. Would Joe ever remember? What would he tell Pa and Hoss when they came home from their hunting trip? Adam sighed and ran a hand over his face before going back to sit down in his chair. He watched Joe sleeping until his own eyes slowly drifted shut and he fell into a restless sleep.

When Joe woke up next, it appeared to be the dead of night. He looked around confused, when had he been moved? He now lay in a big soft bed, and though he couldn't make out much else about the room, he noticed that man was sound asleep in a chair near the bed. His head itched, slowly and carefully he reached up to scratch it, but instead of light fabric his fingers met a heavy bandage. He wasn't sure what woke him, and he closed his eyes and tried to go back to sleep, but it eluded him. His body ached worse than ever, he was cold beneath his pile of blankets, but his body was sweating, which in turn made him even more cold. and his stomach was churning, but all that paled in comparison to the pain in his head. He sat up and cried confused and frustrated tears. He wanted to go home! Wherever that was. He wanted his family! Whoever they were. And he wanted to know what this man wasn't telling him! He got the feeling this man, Adam, knew a lot more about him than just finding him in his barn.

Adam stretched slightly and opened his eyes. He was surprised to find Joe already awake. "Well, how do you feel?"

Joe looked at him through tears, and frowned. How did he think he felt? "Like I went three rounds with a prizefighter, and lost. Then took a nice nap in a freezing cold snow bank." He chuckled, then shivered as if to emphasize his point.

Adam frowned at Joe's words, but nodded in understanding. "The doctor came earlier. He said with plenty of rest you should be fully healed in a few days."

Joe leaned heavily back into the pillows, his body beginning to once again feel like it was made of lead. His eyes were starting to close again, but he fought hard against it, studying the young man in front of him with a piercing gaze. It was as if he hoped to read the mans entire history, in his face. Finally he spoke. "Mr. Adam...why do you care about me so much? If you didn't you'd be sleepin in your own bed, by now. Why're you here, in that chair?"

Adam blinked, a little surprised at the question, but he sighed. "I guess you just remind me of someone. He's-He's gone away for now."

The boy glanced down and frowned, picking at the bedclothes a while, before looking back up. "Remind you of someone? Is that why you called this home, earlier? Who is he? Is my name really Joe, then?"

Adam nodded. "You remind me of my little brother - Joe. I don't know if your name is really Joe, but, if it's okay, that's what I can call you. Probably better than saying "Hey you"."

Joe nodded, "Okay, I kinda like that name...I just kinda wish I had a name of my very own, you know? One that belongs to me. Well I'm sure I do, even if we don't know it......but Joe's nice. It....kinda fits, sorta, if you know what I mean?" Joe snuggled deeper into the mountain of blankets, he couldn't fight anymore, his eyes drifted shut and a deep sleep took him. His dreams kept repeating over and over, first a barn door swinging in the wind, then a dapple colored stallion, frightened by a storm. Over and over and over again, they played through his dreams.

Adam carefully watched Joe, noticing when the nightmare began. Without thinking, Adam stood and sat on the edge of the bed, gently shaking Joe's shoulder. "Hey, Joe. Wake up. It's just a dream. Come on, little buddy, it's just a dream."

Joe's eyes snapped open, and he bolted upright, ignoring the way it made his head pitch and spin. He looked around the room like he wasn't even there, slowly his eyes began to focus, and he wiped away his tears. Looking down at the small droplets of water on his fingers as if he were confused by them, then looked up at Adam. "Little Buddy...I've heard that before...you're voice...you've called me that before." Missing the hopeful look in Adams eyes, he continued. "Musta been when you found me....it was real cold and smelly, and I heard a voice. Called me Joe then, too. That musta been you."

Adam's hopes dropped a little. "Yeah. It must've been. I'm surprised you remember that much. You were pretty out of it."

Joe shook his head, "Musta been that dream...about the barn door and the horse. Musta reminded me or something."

Adam nodded and stood. "Well, the doctor did say that your memory would come back with time. Hopefully the nightmares will disappear by then too."

Joe looked hopeful, he barely dared to believe it might be true. " So....I won't be this way forever? I'll remember who my family is and not get sent away?" His gaze fell and his voice dropped a little. "See, I wanna remember before I get sent to some horrible orphanage. I don't want to end up *to* far away from my family, just in case." Just then a horrible thought struck him. "What if I *am* an orphan, or a runaway?!?!" He demanded, getting himself excited. " I don't *feel* like I am, but I guess when you can't remember *feelings* don't mean much. Or what if my family finds me, but I still can't remember? What if I never do? What if they don't want me no more, if I can't even remember my own name?" The tears started to roll down his cheeks faster and faster, until his eyes were so overflowing with tears, he could barely see.

Adam's heart broke at the sight of his little brother breaking down and he gently pulled him to his chest, rocking him, soothing him. "You're not going to an orphanage, Joe. I'll fight them if I have to. And your family loves you very much, I'm sure of it, little buddy. They'd be fools not to." Inside, Adam was screaming. He wanted so desperately to tell Joe the truth, but the thought that maybe it would set Joe back caused him to keep his mouth shut.

Joe had resisted at first, as Mr. Adam pulled him into an embrace. But he desperately needed comfort, and as this mans arms somehow felt....secure, safe, he relaxed and accepted the soothing words and motions, the tears continuing to fall. He wrapped his arms around Mr. Adams waist, and clung to him, and his words, like a life raft, his grip only loosening as he drifted back off to sleep. He was so grateful that it had been such a kind man that had found him. Just before his eyes closed, he uttered one word, filled with so much meaning. "Promise?" Promise you won't send me away? Promise you'll fight for me? Promise that my family loves me, and will continue to love me? Promise me that everything will be okay?

Adam swallowed the lump in his throat and kissed the top of Joe's head. "I promise, little buddy."


	3. Chapter 3

Joe awoke to the intruding light of morning, late morning by the looks of things. He suddenly realized he was laying in an awkward position, and that he was even more stiff than he had been last night. It took him another moment to realize that he definitely wasn't on a mattress. He was still on Mr. Adam! The man must have sat back and leaned against the headboard, falling asleep before he had put him down. Joe tried to squirm his way out without waking Adam, but it was impossible. He was to sore and weak, he could still barely move, and Adam had a heavy arm around his back, pinning him there. There was no help for it, he was sore and thirsty, he just wanted back on the soft pillows. "Er, Mr. Adam? Wake up, please. I'm kinda trapped."

Adam's eyes opened slowly at Joe's voice. He blinked a few times before disentangling himself from Joe and sitting on the chair. "You feeling any better, Joe?"

Joe thought a minute, as he settled himself into a more comfortable position, stretching his cramped limbs. "I think so. Still feel kinda sick, and I'm more sore now....but I think that was from sleeping funny. My heads a little better, itches like crazy though. You...think you could do me a favor though?" He squinted against the light. "I'm pretty thirsty, and it's a little bright in here. Could you maybe pour me a glass of water, and shut the drapes?"

Adam nodded. "Of course." Getting up, he shut the drapes and poured a glass from the pitcher sitting on the dresser. He handed it to Joe to drink.

Joe fully opened his eyes, the dimmed light much easier on his headache, and accepted the glass. Before drinking, he peeled back one of the many covers, and shoved it to the side of the bed. "Bit warmer in here, today." He explained before he tipped the glass to his lips and guzzled down the contents. He must have drank it to fast for his sensitive stomach to handle, because pretty soon he was leaning over for the bucket someone placed in close proximity to the bed. He huddled over it, and gagged and retched, finally emptying the contents of his stomach. Thankfully, the only contents *in* his stomach, were a few glasses of water. He huddled over a few extra minutes, until he was sure he was finished, then sheepishly sat the bucket back on the floor. "I'm sorry, Mr. Adam."

Adam removed the bucket from beside the bed to empty later then turned back to Joe. "It's not your fault, Joe. You're sick. Next time, just take it easier, okay? Little sips."

Joe nodded and repeated. "Little sips, got it."

Adam smiled and ruffled Joe's hair a little. "Maybe later we'll see if you can hold any solid foods down. I'll be right back. I'm just gonna empty this bucket outside."

Joe smiled and nodded, watching Adam go. However the minute Adam was out of sight, the smile faded. For reasons he didn't understand, he wanted Mr. Adam near him, and for the first time since all of this happened, he wasn't. It made Joe anxious, so he did all he really could do, he stared hard at the door, waiting for Mr. Adam to come back.

Adam got rid of the vomit and cleaned out the bucket. He entered through the kitchen and leaned against the counter, bowing his head. Sending up a silent prayer, he took a deep breath and grabbed the bucket, heading back upstairs and into Joe's bedroom.

Joe let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding, as Adam walked back into the room. His return vanquishing the strange emptiness that had accompanied his absence. He smiled, and going with a sudden gut feeling, he asked. "Mr. Adam, do you think you could read to me some? Like King Arthur? Or Shakespeare? You seem like you might be the type to like Shakespeare."

Adam's eyes widened at the request, but he nodded and walked out of the room into his own, grabbed a book, and went back into Joe's room. "King Arthur seems like a good choice." Smiling, Adam started reading, his voice filling the room.

Joe settled back, and closed his eyes, Mr. Adam had a good strong reading voice, and he allowed it to fill his senses. He could *see* the brave knights of Camelot circling the round table, and riding off to battle. King Arthur at the head wielding the Mighty Excalibur, banners waving, Merlin at his side. When Adam finished he opened his eyes, and grinned. " I like that story, it....it seemed familiar. Like maybe someone read it to me before, some of the words were pretty big, so I don't think I read it by myself. You know what Mr. Adam? You have a reeeeally good reading voice. You're real little brother is real lucky, to live with you and listen to you read whenever he wants!"

Adam smiled slightly. "Thanks, Joe. That means a lot to me."

Joe smiled back. "And thank you for reading it to me! It was a real good story." He looked Adam up and down, and was struck by an odd thought. Sure Mr. Adam looked young and all, but he just felt so comfortable with him. Could he feel so comfortable with just a random stranger? Comfortable enough to let him hold him all night? And how about the empty feeling when Mr. Adam left the room? He wasn't sure how he was going to put the thoughts into words, but he had to try. "Mr. Adam?"

Adam looked up, expectantly. He noticed the look on Joe's face and set the book aside. "Yes, Joe?"

Joe squirmed uncomfortably, embarrassed about what he was about to say. "Well....it might sound kinda weird...but I feel like you're almost familiar. Like I know you, or I should. And that name.....Joe. Well I know you look really young....but...." He let his thoughts trail off, hoping he wouldn't have to put this into words.

Adam's eyes seemed to light up. "Are you starting to remember?"

Joe shook his head. "I dunno. Maybe? It's silly.....but maybe we're related? Like maybe you're my.....my father? Maybe?"

Adam sat there a minute, just staring at Joe. A few minutes later, a smile was spreading across his face, then he was chuckling until a laugh escaped his lips. He shook his head and looked at Joe. "I'm not your father, Joe."

Joe failed to see the humor, in the situation. All he felt was mortification, his face turned scarlet. "Well I said it was silly, you didn't have to laugh at me! Just...you seemed soooo familiar. And I felt safe with you. So if you're not my father, who are you then? And do you know who my father is? And why didn't you take me home, if you do?"

Adam's face turned serious and he sighed. He should've known that Joe would've asked questions. "I'm a friend, Joe. And yes, I DO know who your father is. The reason I haven't taken you home . . . . is because this IS your home."

Joe frowned, more confused than ever. "Then if we're not related, why're you here, and not my family? Where *is* my family....did something happen to them? And you *must* know my *real* name, what is it?"

Adam sighed. "Joe, you need to calm down. I can only answer one question at a time. The doctor thinks it's better if you aren't told everything, just in case it might set you further back than you already are."

Joe closed his hands into fists. and he pounded them onto his knees. " I WON'T calm down! You know something and you're not telling me! It's *my* life, don't I *deserve* to know about my own life?!?!"

Adam grabbed Joe's fists and held them down. "And this is exactly why Doctor Martin didn't want you to know. Because he knew you'd get upset and lash out. Now calm down, Joe!"

Joe struggled and thrashed, but he couldn't turn himself loose. "I don't WANNA calm down! I don't HAVE to!" He struggled and struggled, quickly tiring himself out. His screams dissolving into angry sobs.

Adam let go of Joe's fists, knowing it was over and Joe was too tired to fight anymore. Cupping his little brother's face in his hands, he spoke, "Joe, look at me. I promise you. When you calm down, we'll talk and I'll tell you everything, okay?"

Joe took several deeps breaths, gulping against the lump in his throat. He raised his eyes to Adams, and not trusting his voice, he proceeded to nod.

Adam nodded. "That's it, Little Joe. Just take deep breaths."

Joe frowned, and swallowed again. "Little....Little Joe?"

Adam paled slightly. "I-It was just a nickname I used for my little brother. He was born early and he was so small so the name just stuck. Sorry, it just slipped out."

Joe furrowed his brows, the nickname was having a mysterious calming effect on him. Like a warm blanket. "No, don't be sorry. I kind of like it." He took a deep breath." So...is my real name Joe? Like your brother? Or are you really keeping my real name a secret.?"

Adam nodded. "Yes, your real name is Joe."

Joe nodded, "I thought so. So...you never told me where your brother is. You said he was away."

Adam ran a hand over his face. "That, well, that's kind of hard to explain. I don't exactly know where he is. He disappeared."

Joe frowned. "Wow, I'm sorry. Like he was kidnapped? I hope you find him."

Adam smiled appreciatively. "Thanks. I think he just got lost and has yet to find his way home."

Joe nodded. "Has he been missing long? If he hasn't maybe he's not to far. I hope you're still looking."

Adam smiled a little. "Yeah, I'm still looking. I don't plan on giving up."

Joe smiled back. "That's good, I have a good feeling about your brother. Maybe I can help you look, when I get better. Hey, you said he's real small. Maybe he's just hiding somewhere." He chuckled slightly, then looked down and began to fiddle with his fingers. "So....well you said when I calmed down, you'd tell me everything." He looked back up hopefully.

Adam sat up a little straighter. "Yes, I did. Okay, we'll start out small. This is the Ponderosa. Your father, Ben Cartwright, owns it. It stretches for 1,000 acres." Adam paused, allowing the information to sink in.

Joe's eyes widened. "Wow, that's really big!" Then he let out a sudden little giggle. "Ponderosa is kind of a funny name....isn't it? He sobered back up as he repeated his fathers name, oh so softly. "Ben Cartwright.....so what's my mothers name? Where are my parents?"

Adam didn't say anything for a minute. "Y-Your mother's name was Marie Cartwright."

Joe frowned, he got the feeling Adam was hiding something again. "Was? Where is she now?"

Adam stood, walking to the window, and just standing there. "Your mother . . . . passed away when you were almost five years old. She was seriously hurt in a riding accident."

Joe sat there silently for a moment, grieving for this woman he didn't even remember. "What was she like?"

Adam stared out the window, remembering the woman he had eventually come to know as his mother. "She was pretty, Joe. Her smile could light up a room and she always spoke her mind. She loved you more than anything."

Joe sniffled and nodded, picturing a beautiful woman in his mind. Though he had no way of knowing if that was how she looked. "And my father?"

At that question, Adam turned to face Joe, a small smile on his face. "Your father's fair. He listens when people talk to him and he has a lot of people who respect him. He loves you, Joe, that you can be sure of. He'll want to help you just as much as I do."

Joe nodded, getting a brief glimpse of a man, big with black hair turning silver, warm brown eyes. "Where is he?"

Adam smiled. "He and your older brother are on a hunting trip right now. They should be coming home in a few days."

Joe smiled, that had been his next question. "So I have a big brother? Just the one? Are there any younger kids for me to boss around?" He asked hopefully.

Adam swallowed the large lump in his throat. "No, you don't have any younger brothers or sisters."

Joe frowned a little disappointed. "Oh....well I guess I can live with that, long as I can get away with stuff. So, I just have one big brother then?"

Adam turned to face the window again. "No, actually. You have another older brother."


	4. Chapter 4

Joe smiled. "I do? Tell me about them! What are their names?" He looked at Adam eagerly, not registering his hesitancy.

Adam didn't turn from the window. "Eric is your older brother by six years. We all call him Hoss cause he's so big. He's strong as an ox, but has a good heart. He loves animals and he's very protective of you."

Joe soaked all this in, and smiled. "Hoss, I like that. He sounds nice. What about my other brother?"

Adam turned, a smile on his face. "I think that's enough for now, Joe."

Joe's smile melted into a frown. "But Adam! You can't tell a kid he has two brothers, and only tell him about one! I wanna know about my other brother! Pleeeease?!?! You told me...told me my mother is dead! How much worse can whatever you know about my brother be? I won't be able to relax till I know, I'll just sit here and try and force myself to remember until my head explodes! I swear I will!" He winced at the memory of the pain in his head, the last time he tried to force himself to remember.

Adam sighed and shook his head. "I-I just don't know that much about your other brother, Joe. Not as much as I know about everyone else."

Joe crossed his arms and stared Adam down. He summoned the strength to argue some more. "I don't believe you! How come you know about everyone else, but not him? I think you're lying to me! If you just didn't know much, you'd tell me what you *did* know. Not try and tell me I've heard enough! There's something you're hiding from me, and I wanna know what it is!" The excitement was getting to be to much for him again, rather large coughs racking his small body.

Adam shook his head. "You're too upset right now. It'll have to wait for later, Joe."

Joe managed to choke out between coughs. "No! I wanna hear about my brother, NOW!" He curled up into the fetal position, coughing hard into his knees.

Adam sighed, but there was no way he could tell Joe everything, not just yet. "Sorry, Joe, but I can't do that. I'm going downstairs to get some casserole to bring up. I'll be back." That said, he turned to the door.

Joe twisted over onto his stomach and sobbed into his pillow.

Adam didn't move from his position. "Joe, your other brother, well, he's different. He went to college, got an education. He can be real stubborn sometimes. You call him 'Yankee Granite Head' on occasion. He's always looked out for you and your brother, Hoss. He helps out with the ranch work and actually helped build a lot of the buildings on the Ponderosa." Adam stopped a moment. "Now will you try to get some sleep?"

Joe twisted back over. "You didn't tell me his name. You promised to tell me everything, 'member?"

Adam didn't reply for a while.

"What's the problem with telling me about him! He doesn't sound bad, but you lied and said you didn't know him! You LIED. And now you won't tell me my own brothers name?!?! ADAM! What did you kill him or something?" He began to look at Adam, fearfully studying him. "You didn't...did you?" He asked in a small voice.

Adam shook his head. "No, Joe, your brother's not dead and I didn't kill him."

Joe pounded his fists on the bed, "Then..why won't you tell me his name? He's my *brother* and you promised to tell me *everything*, or was that a lie?" He turned pleading puppy dog eyes on Adam. "Please....tell me, and I *promise* to calm down, and do anything you want. Eat, sleep, even clean out your chicken coop and muck the stalls!"

Adam stared at the door, his thoughts jumbled and a mess, but he knew one thing. He had to tell Joe, even if, on the inside, it killed him. "Joe, your oldest brother's name . . . . . is Adam." That said, Adam didn't wait for a reply and left the room, closing the door behind him. That done, he leaned against the wall, sliding down it seeing as his legs could no longer support him. Tears silently fell down his cheeks and he buried his face in his knee as he allowed all of his emotions to come out.


	5. Chapter 5

Joe stared dumbfounded at Adams retreating back, not moving a muscle, tears streaming down his cheeks, as his damaged mind sluggishly clicked the pieces together. Or some of them. "So Adam wasn't his FATHER he was his BROTHER. HE was Adams missing little brother, and it was only his mind that was lost. That Little Joe nickname was his! He couldn't even imagine how badly he must have hurt Adams feelings. He only wished he could remember! He sat there and stared at the door a while, his head hurting worse than ever from the exertion. Finally, he climbed unsteadily from the bed, his legs dangerously wobbly beneath him, but he managed to slowly fight his way to the door. After that little victory, he clutched the doorknob for support, resting a moment before he pulled open the door, and stepped into the hall. Immediately spotting Adam on the ground by the door, he gratefully sank to the floor and silently crawled into Adams lap.

Adam was surprised when he saw Joe but said nothing as the younger boy crawled into his lap. The tears were still coming, silently and slow, but they were still there.

Joe snuggled into Adams chest, and sighed, allowing the warmth of his chest and steady beat of his heart to help calm him. "Adam, I'm real real sorry I forgot you. I didn't mean to do it...you've been so nice, and I've been hurting your feelings!" He spoke in a voice hoarse from crying and screaming.

Adam looked down at his younger brother and sighed. "It's not your fault, Joe. I should've told you the truth from the beginning, but, well, I was afraid it would set you back further. The only reason I didn't want to tell you is because I didn't want you to think I was lying to you. You can forget me all you want, little buddy, just know that I'll never lie to you."

Joe sighed again and nodded, "Okay....Mr....er Adam? Since you're my brother, it's not weird or babyish for me to sit in your lap? Even if I can't remember you?"

He looked up at Adam with wide eyes, desperate for the answer. Even though he thought he should probably be thinking of Adam as a stranger, he was...comfortable with him.

Adam chuckled a little. "You used to climb onto my lap all the time a few years ago. Or you'd climb into bed with me after a nightmare. I don't think this one time will hurt, Joe." Adam wrapped his arms around him, hugging him gently. "I'm glad you feel comfortable enough around me to do this, even with your memory loss."

Joe nodded solemnly, and leaned back into Adam. "I...don't know why. My brain says I don't know you....but I still *trust* you. Well, I did fall asleep on you like this last night.....*all* night." He looked down sheepishly. "That....doesn't make me weird, does it? *Should* I be treating you like a stranger, because I can't 'member?"

He slipped his arms around Adams neck, and hugged tight. "I suuuuuuuure am confused!" Pulling back, he looked Adam in the eyes. "Adam...I'm real reeeeeal thirsty." He hesitated a moment, realizing he hadn't eaten anything since he woke up on the settee. His stomach was still rolling and flopping, but maybe he should try and eat something. "And maybe I could get a little something to eat...maybe?" He searched Adams face for signs of whether or not it was a good idea.

Adam chuckled. "Well, we'll just have to do something about that then, won't we?" Adam stood and wordlessly lifted Joe up into his arms. He walked back into the bedroom and placed him on the bed. Walking over to the water pitcher, he poured a glass and handed it to Joe to drink. "Remember, little sips and I'll be right back up with that casserole."

Joe accepted the glass, and took exaggeratedly small slow sips, grateful as the cool liquid soothed his burning throat, resisting the urge to gulp and chug. He watched Adam go, and set his glass down, and leaned back closing his eyes. They stung from all the crying he had done, so he had to blink several times. Finally, he fell into a very light doze.

Adam wandered downstairs and into the kitchen, grabbing two plates and placing pieces of the casserole on them. After gathering everything he'd need, he headed back upstairs to Joe's room and entered. He smiled at seeing Joe sleeping and quietly placed the tray on the table next to the bed. Just as silently, he turned, ready to leave the room and allow his younger brother to sleep.

The soft thump of the tray being set down startled Joe, and he jerked awake, confusedly blinking away the sleep. Finally his eyes cleared, and he spotted Adams retreating back. "Oh! I'm sorry Adam, I only meant to rest my eyes. I didn't mean to send you for something, then fall asleep while you were getting it."

Adam smiled and turned to face Joe. "It's okay, little buddy. You're sick and your body has to be tired. Do you want to try eating now or we can always wait if you want to sleep a little more."

Joe frowned and thought a moment, he was really sleepy and his stomach *was* churning. "You won't mind if I wait, and sleep just a little while? I'm sorry I sent you for the fooo...." He cut off and yawned loudly, leaning back into his pillows.

Adam moved to push Joe's hair back, but stopped himself, remembering that Joe didn't have his memory. Satisfying himself with patting and squeezing the younger boy's shoulder, Adam shook his head. "I don't mind at all, Joe. You get some sleep and I'll reheat the casserole when you wake up."

Joe nodded gratefully, "Thanks....you know, for everything." He flashed a small smile, as his eyes slowly drifted shut, lacking the ability to keep them open for even another second.

Adam smiled as he picked up the plates and headed for the door. Before leaving, he turned once again to look back at Joe. The smile faded a little. "You're welcome, little brother."

Joe fell into a deep sleep, forgotten images swirling through his mind, like an out of control whirlwind. People lacking faces speaking to him nonsense words in flat toneless voices. Then Adam was there, his face suddenly melting away and dripping to the floor. Joe began to thrash and scream wildly.

Hearing the noise, Adam frowned before it registered what exactly he was hearing. Without thinking twice, he took the stairs two at a time and rushed into Joe's bedroom. Taking in the situation, he sat on the bed, holding Joe's shoulders down, yet shaking him gently in the process. "Joe. Joe! Wake up! It's just a nightmare! Come on, Little Buddy, wake up!"

Joe fought and bucked against the force holding him down, like his very life depended on it. "No! No! Let me go! Let...me...GO!!!"

Adam fought Joe a while longer before his anger got the better of him. "Joseph Francis Cartwright, calm down!"

Joe's eyes snapped open, but he didn't stop fighting. He wriggled and squirmed, until he somehow finally managed to escape Adam's hold on him. He fell to the floor, and scrambled to the far side of the room, pressing his back up against the wall, his little heart feeling like it was close to beating itself from his chest.

Adam waited a moment before slowly approaching Joe, his hand cautiously outstretched as if reaching towards an injured animal. "Joe, you have to calm down. Look at me. Come on, little buddy. It was just a nightmare. You're okay. You're safe."

Joe huddled himself tight, hiding his face into his knees. Afraid to move, afraid to speak, afraid to do anything, his entire body trembling, drenched through with cold sweat.

Adam was becoming worried. "Joe, talk to me. Tell me about it. You used to talk to me about everything. I know you don't remember, but you did. I hope you still can. Come on, little brother, tell me what's wrong."

Joe shook his head vigorously, never lifting his face from his knees. "I...I don't know. J-just a...bad dream. J-just let me....I'm okay....I'll be okay."

Adam closed his eyes and silently thanked God that Joe answered him. He was slightly hurt that Joe didn't want to tell him what was wrong, but he figured he could live with it. "Well, lets at least get you back into bed, okay?"

Joe sat unmoving for another minute or so, then crawled his way back to the bed, never giving Adam the opportunity to touch him. He sat straight up on the bed, taking up the same position that he had on the floor, unmoving as a statue.

Adam ignored the hurt feeling in the pit of his stomach as he watched his younger brother, worriedly. He made no move to help Joe, seeing that he didn't want or need it. Adam stood there a while before turning to face the door, prepared to leave and give Joe some time to himself.

Joe peeked through the crack in his arms, watching Adam's retreating back, taking in the dejected slope of the man's shoulders. He felt a pang of guilt. He hadn't meant to hurt his feelings, but he just couldn't bring himself to move or speak, not just yet.

Adam headed downstairs and sat on the settee. He opened his book, but closed it seconds later, finding no interest at all in the story he had read countless times before. He rubbed his eyes, wiping away any traces of moisture that had appeared. Someone knocked on the door and, without waiting for an answer, the person entered the house. Adam stood upon seeing Randy, the assistant foreman. Randy looked at him, breathing heavily as he spoke. "Mr. Cartwright. Big fire. Up by the North pasture." Adam needed no further encouragement as he hurried upstairs and put his boots on. That done, he raced back downstairs and joined Randy, nodding to him to get going as he grabbed his hat and gun belt.

Joe slowly climbed off of the bed, careful not to move to fast. He stood and dragged a chair over to the window, climbing up and settling in, the late afternoon sunshine streaming through the window. He stared out at the beautiful scenery, but it wasn't long before his mind wandered back to his dream, the horrible images of faceless specters dancing across his mind. He gave an involuntary shudder, and tried to grasp onto anything else to take his mind off of it. Unfortunately, one of the things about having no memories, was that he didn't have much to think about! Virtually no memories, nothing to look forward to, or to think back on. So first he tried thinking about the knights in shining armor from the story Adam had read, but found his mind drifting off to what Adam had told him about his family, imagining what they might look like, what they might be like. They sounded really nice, from what Adam had told him, but he wished he had his own memories to draw from, his own opinions.

Adam coughed from the smoke billowing all around him as his hoarse voice shouted orders to volunteering hands. Several bucket lines were formed as water was poured over the fire in a desperate attempt to put it out. Adam coughed and tears fell down his cheeks as the smoke got into his eyes, burning and blinding him. Several hands realized the situation and hurriedly pulled Adam away from the smoke and back to where the horses were tied, allowing him to catch his breath for a minute or two. When he felt like he had had enough fresh air, Adam plunged back into the swirling smoke and raging fire to help the hands work. He barely missed a flaming tree branch as it fell to the earth and crackled menacingly. As Adam was about to join one of the bucket lines, something wet touched his cheek. He stopped and felt the area, surprised to find a drop of water. Looking up into the sky, a broad grin spread across his face as more drops followed until a gentle rain was soaking him. The others cheered loudly at the gift sent from heaven and Adam breathed a deep sigh of relief. As the fire gradually died out, he glanced around, thanked the men, and proceeded to mount Sport and head back towards the house.

Joe wasn't sure how long he had been sitting there, but he had definitely managed to calm down. He took a deep breath, and watched as the pearly gray clouds blanketed over the blue sky, and the tiny droplets began to drop from the sky in a light rain. He had been so engrossed in his own thoughts he hadn't heard Adam leave, but he definitely heard hoof beats approaching now.

Adam dismounted Sport and headed into the house. His hair splayed across his eyes from the dampness, Adam trudged into the house and collapsed onto the settee, exhausted. He had discovered on the way home that his voice was sore and he decided not to speak for a while so it could heal. With a heavy sigh and a worried look towards the stairs, half hoping Joe would come down, Adam drifted off to sleep, his breathing wheezy.


	6. Chapter 6

Joe heard the hoof beats stop, and the front door open and close, heavy footsteps trudging across the floor. He hoped to God that it was Adam, who else could it be? But he didn't remember hearing Adam leave, after a moments hesitation, he decided to investigate. He grabbed a toy rifle he spotted lying on the floor, it had possibilities, as a club at least. He walked out the door, and tiptoed down the stairs, sighing in relief when he reached the landing, and spotted Adam, asleep on the settee. He came down the rest of the way, and frowned when he realized Adam was practically black with soot, and there was a very smoky smell meeting his nostrils. He felt a tinge of worry, setting the toy down on the floor, he placed his ear near Adams mouth to make sure he was breathing. Smiling, he went over and got the blanket he spotted hanging over the railing, and dropped it on Adams still form. Adam helped him, now he would help Adam! He climbed up into the chair Adam had dragged near the settee, and adopted his pose from the night before.

Adam turned in his sleep, a small groan escaping his lips. He could feel the blanket covering him and sighed at the warmth and comfort.

Joe heard the groan, and felt an inexplicable urge to get closer, to make sure Adam was okay. He kneeled down in front of Adams face, nose to nose, but then thought how that might startle him if he woke up. So he stood up and climbed onto the couch by Adam's feet, snuggling under the blanket with him.

Adam's whole body was sore by the time he woke up. He blinked in surprise at the blanket covering him, but smiled upon seeing Joe at the other end of the settee. Relieved that Joe seemed to have come out of his mood from earlier, Adam got up without waking his younger brother and stood. Gently, he placed the blanket over Joe and then went upstairs. He picked out new clothes to wear and headed back down. He fixed himself a bath and furiously rubbed the soot and dirt from his body, turning the warm water black. That done, he got dressed and went back into the main room, feeling refreshed, though his throat wasn't quite healed yet. He smiled at seeing Joe still sleeping on the settee and walked over, lifting the younger boy into his arms and carrying him back upstairs to his bedroom. Adam pulled the sheets up to Joe's chin and smiled, pushing the hair back out of his eyes, figuring it wouldn't make a difference now since Joe was asleep. He debated on sleeping in the chair by Joe's bed again, but, feeling that his back was hurting, he decided against it and left the room, heading down to his own and closing the door behind him. Facing the bed, he laid on it, his body still exhausted from helping put out the fire. He fell asleep minutes later, the fire still fresh in his mind as the nightmare of a scared little boy trapped by flames plagued him. Adam didn't sleep for very long when he woke with a start from the nightmare. Sighing deeply, he ran a hand over his face and sat up. Knowing he wouldn't be able to get back to sleep, Adam stood and went downstairs to sit at his fathers desk. With nothing better to do, he started working on the books.

Joe woke up very confused, how had he made it to his bed? It took him several seconds to realize that a storm was building up force outside his window, that must have been what had woken him. For some reason, the idea of a storm was making him very skittish, he jumped up and ran downstairs, figuring on at least a glass of water.

Adam looked up in surprise at seeing Joe coming down the stairs. "Well, I see someone's feeling better."

Joe tried to shrug nonchalantly, but the next thunderclap had him bolting over to the desk, like a skittish colt. He sat down on the floor, behind the desk, propping himself up against Adams legs. "Yeah, I guess....you must be feeling better, too. You were all black...smelled like smoke," he said, throwing his head back, so that he could look up at Adams face.

Adam nodded and placed a hand on Joe's shoulder, squeezing it reassuringly.. "There was a fire by the North pasture. I went out to help the hands, but the rain took care of it for us. So, do you think you can hold some food down? I can heat up that casserole for you."

Joe nodded, suddenly realizing that he hadn't had a thing to eat, and he was suddenly ravenous. "Yeah, some food sounds great!"

Adam smiled and stood, heading back into the kitchen and heating up a piece of the casserole. He waited until it seemed warm enough and went back out into the main room. Setting the plate on the table, he waited for Joe to come to the table.

Joe trotted over to the table, and climbed up to into the chair. "Thank you, Mr....er Adam." He lifted a small forkful to his nose, giving a few tentative sniffs before taking a bite. He smiled, "Hey, this is pretty good!" He waited a few moments, to make sure it was staying down, before taking another tiny bite. Looking up, he smiled at Adam. "See, I remembered, tiny bites, just like tiny sips."

Adam nodded and smiled. "Good. Any faster and you'd make yourself sick. I have some paperwork to do so just call me if you need me, okay?"

Joe nodded, "Okay, sure will. Oh and Adam? I didn't have no nightmares or nothin, when I slept this time!" He puffed out his chest like that was a big accomplishment.

Adam patted Joe's shoulder. "I'm glad, little buddy." That said, he headed back to the desk and set to work.

Joe paced himself, and managed to eat about half of the food Adam had set before him, even managed a few sips of milk. When he finished, he went through the doorway he saw Adam use, and set his leftovers on the kitchen counter. That done and feeling like he didn't much want to sit in that bedroom anymore, he went out and sat on the settee. The storm raging outside picking up speed, and making him more jittery, by the second.

Suddenly there was the sound of a barn door flapping in the wind, like someone had just gone in there and left it open, then a horses frantic whinnies carried to the house on the wind. Joe had just been sitting there, when the eerily familiar sounds made his head feel like someone was trying to split it open with a dull axe. He grimaced and cried with pain, as he methodically began rocking back and forth, cradling his head in his hands.


	7. Chapter 7

Adam sighed and ran a hand over his face in frustration. He suddenly remembered why he hated book work and finally closed them, putting them aside to do later. He was about to root through his father's drawers to find the blueprints for the saw mill they planned on building next month, when he heard Joe's cry and stood. Making his way over to the settee, he knelt down. "Joe? Joe, what's wrong?"

Joe tightened his hold on his head, like he was trying to hold the halves together. "M-my heeead, Adam, it huuurts!"

Adam didn't think twice as he sat next to Joe and pulled him into a gentle, yet tight, embrace, rocking him back a forth as he whispered soothing words to comfort him. "It's okay, Joe. I've got you. It's all right, little buddy. It's okay."

Joe's sobs worsened even as Adams warm arms enveloped his small body. His headache, rather than subsiding, seemed to grow steadily worse, as fuzzy pictures drifted in and out of his minds eye. One minute he was looking through the bars on the banister, as a black haired man streaked with silver kissed a petite woman. The next, he was riding on a small pinto pony as a big burly teenager walked on beside him, holding the lead. Finally, as the pain became to much, he embraced the refreshing blackness as he sank into unconsciousness.

Adam's worry increased when Joe went limp in his arms. Anxiously, he laid him full out on the settee, gently patting the younger boy's cheek. "Joe? Joe, wake up. Come on, little buddy. It's me, Joe. It's Adam." Adam swallowed the large lump in his throat and choked back the oncoming tears as he desperately tried to wake his younger brother.

Joe could vaguely hear someone calling his name, as if he were floating underwater. But the darkness was just so soothing, he wasn't ready to leave it just yet. There was no pain in the darkness, and he couldn't handle anymore of that headache!

Adam took immediate action when Joe didn't respond. Hurriedly, he went into the kitchen and came back with a bowl of water and a cloth. Gently, he dabbed at Joe's forehead and neck, hoping maybe the cool sensation would make him open his eyes. As Adam sat there, watching his younger brother, he couldn't help but think back on all of the time they spent together. The fishing trips they went on, the games they had played, and the chores they had done together in order to do the first two things. The tears came down Adam's cheeks and he made no move to stop them as they did. His voice filled the room, telling Joe of almost every adventure they had had together. When Adam ran out of stories, he sat on the settee and placed Joe's head on his lap. He watched him until his eyelids closed and his breathing became slow as sleep overcame him.

Adam's voice managed to sink through and penetrate, some part of Joe's mind, thought he wasn't really able to make out the words. That and the cool sensation on his face and neck, brought him ever closer to the surface of the murky depths of his mind. Slowly he was able to open his heavy eyelids, his splitting headache having subsided into a dull ache, right behind his eyes. He groaned and shielded his eyes as a flash of lightening lit up the room, the light bothering his sensitive eyes.

Adam woke to the sound of groaning and looked down, breathing a deep sigh of relief at seeing Joe moving. In a soft voice, he spoke. "Hey, little buddy. How do you feel?"

Joe blinked several times, and moved his hand. "Uh....okay..I guess? My head hurts a little."

Adam smiled. "You scared me, Joe."

Joe pushed himself up onto his elbows. "I did? I just had a real bad headache, then I woke up here."

Adam nodded. "You passed out. I thought for sure you were . . . . Well, anyway, I'm just glad it wasn't anything serious."

Joe frowned. "I passed out? Adam, it just hurt so bad....I just wanted it to stop."

Adam nodded again. "Yes, you did. I guess everything caught up with you and your head couldn't take it anymore so it gave you that headache."

Joe nodded sullenly, pouting out his lower lip. Looking for some source of comfort. "Adam...do you think that maybe...? Never mind, it's silly."

Adam raised an eyebrow. "What's silly, Joe?"

Joe looked down at his fingers embarrassedly, picking at his fingernails. "I know I'm not a baby anymore, but do you think that I could....Maybe, if it would be okay, could I sleep in Pa's bed tonight?....Maybe?"

Adam smiled. "Of course, Joe. I'm sure Pa wouldn't - ." Adam stopped, his eyes wide as what Joe just said sank in. He looked at his younger brother, hopefully. "Joe, I have a question for you."

Joe cocked his head to the side, interestedly. "What?"

Adam sucked in a deep breath. "What's the name of our cook, Joe?"


	8. Chapter 8

Joe frowned, "Come on Adam, you joshing me? You know Hop Sing's name."

A happy yell filled the air and Adam was hugging Joe to him tightly, tears falling unashamed down his cheeks as he whispered "I missed you, little brother" in Joe's ear.

Joe was startled when Adam yelled, but he seemed so genuinely happy, Joe allowed him to hug him for a minute or two. That is until he cut down on his air supply. "Er thanks big brother, but...you're kinda crushing me."

Adam pulled away immediately, but the wide smile never left his face. The tears continued down his cheeks and he didn't bother brushing them away. Instead, he turned from Joe and headed for the front door, stepping outside into the still windy weather. The fresh air seemed to sooth Adam as the tears continued.

The realization suddenly hit Joe full force, he was REMEBERING! Wasn't he? Some things were still fuzzy, but others he could call up clear as a bell. He stood and followed Adam out the front door, wrapping his arms around his waist, resting his head on his older brother's stomach. "ADAM! I remembered! I REMEMBERED!"

Adam's tears didn't seem to want to stop as he knelt down to Joe's height and enveloped the younger boy in an embrace. "I know, Joe. I'm so glad." Adam's tears soaked Joe's shoulder as he cried into his younger brother.

Joe reached around and stroked the back of Adam's hair, trying to soothe him. "Adam? Don't cry Adam, it's okay! I'm okay! See?" He wrapped his other arm around Adam's neck, and placed a kiss on top of his older brothers head. "It's okay!"

Adam welcomed his brother's soothing words, relishing in knowing that Joe remembered him and everything else. He closed his eyes and gradually got a hold of his emotions. His tears eventually subsided, but he didn't release Joe. At least, not yet.

Joe hugged Adam back just as tightly, but the cold was beginning to seep through his thin nightshirt. He shivered, "A-Adam? It's awful cold out here."

Adam didn't say a word as he lifted Joe into his arms and headed into the house. He didn't say a word as he placed Joe on the settee or when he turned his back to stoke the fire.

Joe took the blanket from the arm of the settee, and wrapped it around his shoulders while he watched Adam work. Something wasn't quite right. "Adam, you okay? You look kinda...tired."

Adam just continued poking the fire and didn't answer. His thoughts seemed miles away as he continued trying to control his emotions.

Joe got up and inched towards the fireplace slowly coming up next to Adam. He raised himself up onto his knees, and placed his hands on either side of Adam's face turning his head to face him. "Adam? You aren't lookin so good. You look tired...sad. You SURE you're okay?"

Adam's hands were clenched into fists and he breathed out slowly. His legs threatened to buckle underneath of him and he sat heavily in the armchair, his fists now shaking. He was emotionally and physically drained and the signs were starting to show. He managed to smile weakly at Joe, trying to reassure him that he would be okay.

Joe frowned, he was getting really worried. He scooted up real close, and rested his chin on Adam's knee. He debated a few moments while looking up into his brothers face, then grabbed and wrung out the wet washcloth Adam had been using, then climbed into his older brothers lap. Not sure what to do, and having seen his father and brothers do this loads of times, when someone wasn't feeling well, he started to gently dab at Adam's face and neck. "You're gonna be okay Adam, I can take care of you, just like you did for me!"

Adam welcomed the cool sensation of the cloth and sighed deeply. His eyes closed briefly and he relaxed against the chair. The last few days had been hard on him with Joe losing his memory and the fire by the North pasture. When Adam spoke, his voice was quiet, almost inaudible. "Thanks, Joe."

Joe nodded, "You're welcome...Granite Head." He smiled mischievously as he said those last two words, his voice picking up a teasing tone. But he didn't, for a second, pause at what he was now considering his job, and taking very seriously. He had to help Adam, and this was the only way he knew how!

Adam felt some of the tension leaving his body and sighed in contentment. After a few more minutes, Adam grabbed the cloth Joe was using and removed it from his hand, setting it on the table. "I'm okay now, Joe."

Joe eyed him warily, studying his face. "You sure? Or're you just sayin that 'cause you want me to stop worryin?"

Adam ignored the question and disentangled himself from his younger brother before slowly standing.

Joe adjusted himself so that he was sitting in the chair properly now. "Hey Adam, where ya goin?"

Adam didn't bother looking back at Joe as he answered. "I'm just going outside for some fresh air, maybe take a ride out to the North pasture and see how the clean-up's coming along." He buckled his gun belt and placed his hat on his head.

Joe pouted, "If I get dressed real quick, can I come along?"

Adam paused just as he was about to open the door. He had a small, grateful smile on his face. He never thought he'd be glad to hear that question again. Turning back to Joe, he nodded. "All right, but be real quick about it."

Joe's face broke into a wide smile. "Oooh, thanks Adam! I'll be *real* quick!" He jumped out of the chair, and ran up to his room. Remembering Pa's rule about dressing for the weather, when you go out, or not going out at all, he chose a thick warm flannel shirt, over gray wool pants. He spent a couple minutes struggling with his boots, then streaked back downstairs for his hat and coat, all remnants of his headache, forgotten.

Adam chuckled at Joe's antics, but headed outside and breathed a sigh at seeing that the storm had moved away. He looked behind him to make sure Joe was still following before heading for the barn. The smile never left his face. It sure was good to have his little brother back.

Joe had to jog to keep up with his older brothers long strides, but he did it happily. It wasn't often that he was allowed to come along on these inspections, especially after dinner time. Since after dinner, it was already dark out, and very close to his bedtime, and Pa and Adam were strictest about sticking to his bedtime. This was a real treat! He somehow managed to catch up, and walked alongside Adam, feeling very grown up.

Adam and Joe made good time. Arriving at the site of the fire, Adam seemed satisfied with the work the hands were doing. After giving a few orders, he turned to Joe. "Lets go home, little buddy."

Joe nodded, "Kay!" He didn't want to admit it, but the smoky air was starting to bother his throat a little, and it was past his bedtime, he was sleepy. He turned his horse homeward, Adam following close behind, and they were home, in no time. They got their horses taken care of, and started back towards the house. Joe stifled a yawn, and looked up at Adam. "Don't forget, you said it'd be okay if I stayed in Pa's bed, tonight!"

Adam smiled and nodded. "I remember. Go on and head to bed. I want to look over a few more things before I head up."

Joe nodded and bit his lip hesitantly, "Hey Adam? Pa's bed is awful big...would you mind staying with me tonight?" He asked hopefully. He didn't much want to admit it, but Adam was the only member of his family around, and he didn't want him out of his sight for long. Almost as if he didn't have a tangible connection to his family, he'd forget, and therefore lose, them all over again!

Adam patted Joe's shoulder. "Sure, Joe. I'll be right up, okay?"

Joe smiled and nodded, then went straight up to his room for a nightshirt. Then as an afterthought, he rifled through his toy chest and pulled out Bobo, the little stuffed bear his mama had made for him. He didn't need Bobo very often anymore, but this was one of those times. He walked across the hall to Bens room, and jumped into the big bed. Joe pulled up the blankets, and laid his head on the pillow, breathing in the scent of saddle soap, leather, and cologne that was uniquely Pa. He cuddled up with Bobo and settled in, waiting for Adam, but he had an eventful day and it was way past his bedtime, and soon he couldn't keep his eyes open anymore.

Adam finally finished what little paperwork he had left and went upstairs. After preparing for bed, he went down to his father's room and smiled upon finding his little brother already asleep on the bed. Quietly, he tip-toed to the bed and laid down next to his younger brother. Gently placing a kiss on Joe's head, Adam settled down and closed his eyes, sleep overtaking him almost immediately.

**Thank you to everyone who read and reviewed this story. Your feedback is greatly appreciated.**


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